I get it, carbs are amazing. Lord knows I couldn't possibly make a satisfying sandwich without them, i wake up in the night sometimes craving a nice, fat bagel, and don't even get me started on my life-long commitment to pasta.
But here's the thing: Genetically speaking, as a Homo sapien, I am an omnivore. And you, genetically Felis castus - or Felis domestica - are a carnivorous mammal. And that is why I cannot comprehend what drives this inner compulsion of yours to seek out and consume CARBOHYDRATES.
Two days ago i bought two loaves of bread on sale, thinking I would slice one of them and freeze it, thus storing some extra food for the coming weeks when I would not have time to go purchase fresh bread for dinner. You -- RONAN -- have spoiled this plan.
Exhibit A & B: A previously pristine loaf of 12-Grain Bread (yes, really) that you have mangled through the plastic bag and torn pieces out of for your late night snacking pleasure.
Exhibit A. |
Exhibit B. |
Exhibit C & D: Your completely guilty (if completely adorable) face.
Exhibit C. (w/ possibly accomplice?) |
Exhibit D. |
Look.
I love you. And I like carbs. And I get if you like carbs, too. But for the love of god, stop eating my bread!
Sincerely,
Your frustrated human,
Rain
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